The Secret to Happiness!

I was having a conversation with a stranger at a networking event where we were partnered up randomly and given a topic.  Halfway into our time he asked me, “What’s the secret to happiness?” and was surprised when I had a confident answer.  A great discussion ensued (and a friendship)!  After 40+ years of serious evolution in terms of my personal happiness and studying this topic rigorously through my business the past 8 years, it’s not an exaggeration to say I have a very strong stance on happiness 'hows and whys.'  I am excited to share some of them with you here! 

The Basics: First, the key to happiness lies in not relying on others to make one happy, but in acknowledging that happiness comes from within.  Second, setting meaningful, personally challenging goals is an important element in creating happiness.  Third, happiness is strengthened when one feels like they are actively creating the circumstances and lifestyle they choose.  Let’s explore these a bit further:

Achieving the goal is not where happiness comes from.  Yes, achievement gives us a short-term boost in happiness, but longer-term, sustainable happiness comes from the wins along the way, such as the small triumphs from making decisions differently and overcoming habits – as well as the opportunity to be proud of our own performance and deepen our own confidence, and from the positive relationships that develop and adventures experienced.  Yet ultimately, it’s about WHO we become as a result of going after meaningful and challenging goals, and how we feel about it.  Of course, please do enjoy the fruits of your labor and celebrate the actual achievement of a goal.  Celebrate, smile, enjoy.  

Set the next goal quickly, before you have the chance to rest on your laurels. Beware that stagnation and minor depression often come immediately after achieving something significant.  Avoid this by thinking of big-picture ideas, bucket lists, purpose, mission, etc…and pick an exciting challenge and set yourself back in motion. A life fully lived includes striving for something, a sense of purpose that gives people energy, and the growth that comes from effort.

To be most successful in creating more happiness for yourself, you need to acknowledge that happiness itself is not a goal, but a state of mind.  When most people are asked what they want, and the layers are peeled back, they ultimately admit they want the money, stuff, time, and freedom because they want to be happy.  None of those actually creates happiness! Technically, one can choose to be in a happy state of mind regardless of outer circumstances.  Most people allow their happiness to be conditional upon certain circumstances or the amount of control they feel they have.  It’s important to acknowledge that one ALWAYS has control over how they feel.  It takes a good deal of practice for most people, so especially when still learning and growing, seek to take control in small, positive ways which will help foster happiness more frequently until it becomes a habit.

Try it now: 1. Select a personally meaningful goal that requires you to get out of your comfort zone. 2. Identify 3 small steps or tasks that you can accomplish within the next week. This may require breaking things down into very small bytes.  3. Complete the first one within the next 30 minutes.  4. Smile. 5. Decide when you will complete the other two and schedule them into your week.  Enjoy the state of mind you just created for yourself!  (Repeat regularly for maximum results.)

To your continued success, 

Heather A Legge

www.EnvisionSuccessInc.com