What I learned during my weight workout this morning, from a video presentation of Dennis Waitley (what perfect timing with the games in London currently!)
5 Olympic Attitudes (for Success):
I. Adapt to Change
A great formula for dealing with change proactively is KASH; continue enhancing in every area-
K nowledge
A ttitute
S kills
H abits
Envision Success Inc blog posts from Executive, Business, and Life Coaches on topics like Saying No, Focus, Effectiveness, Leadership, Changing Habits, Communication, Boundaries, Work Life Balance, and Perfectionism.
Showing posts with label expectation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label expectation. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Only Winners Set Goals
Success requires no apologies.
Failure permits no alibis.
~ Napoleon Hill
Aaaah, the promise of a new year, and with it the hopes of greater achievements than years past. I absolutely love this time of year. All the planning and imagining how great things will be when all those accomplishments come to fruition! Oh wait, a dose of reality...most people don't achieve their goals and dreams. Most people don't set goals at all. Most people don't allow themselves the "luxury" of dreams. It's unfortunate that most people don't understand how it all works.
Failure permits no alibis.
~ Napoleon Hill
Aaaah, the promise of a new year, and with it the hopes of greater achievements than years past. I absolutely love this time of year. All the planning and imagining how great things will be when all those accomplishments come to fruition! Oh wait, a dose of reality...most people don't achieve their goals and dreams. Most people don't set goals at all. Most people don't allow themselves the "luxury" of dreams. It's unfortunate that most people don't understand how it all works.
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Friday, September 23, 2011
How Running Made Me A Better Coach
~a personal story~
I am set to run my first half-marathon in 2 days. I'm a smidge intimidated at the thought of joining the crowd of 'real' runners and full marathoners, but at the same time I feel confident about completing the race. I WILL finish. And in two months Friday, August 5, 2011
3 Reasons Why a Sunny Outlook Brings More Success
People often make fun of "the power of positive thinking" - or consider people who subscribe synonymous with idiots walking on rainbows with rays of sunshine coming out their
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Thursday, September 30, 2010
Cultivating a Daily Success Mindset
What one skill do all successful people, all around the world, and all throughout time, have in common?
Whether they realize it or not, they all are masters at visualizing their success. They routinely envision successful outcomes--and most often expect nothing else. Their words likely match their thoughts, but they may have also mastered the art of not telling everyone how confident they are. If you could tap into the minds of the top tier of successful people, you would find
Whether they realize it or not, they all are masters at visualizing their success. They routinely envision successful outcomes--and most often expect nothing else. Their words likely match their thoughts, but they may have also mastered the art of not telling everyone how confident they are. If you could tap into the minds of the top tier of successful people, you would find
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Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Managing Work-Related Stress
What is a typical work day like for a modern working professional? It’s often described as hectic, or frustrating, or rushed...but also as productive, sometimes as satisfying. However, most people describe their work days in terms of all the elements they do NOT have control over.
Relaxed Control
What does this mean? You may think this is an oxymoron (like 'jumbo shrimp'), but I believe it is a much better way to describe the opposite of stressed than “not stressed.” First, however, let's establish what stress is.
Stress is...a feeling that's created when we react to particular events. Or: physical, mental, or emotional strain or tension.
A client of mine "Kathy" is a project leader in a large company. She came to me originally because she felt so unhappy about her work shewanted to talk about career options. However in her case, another job was not the solution and we went to work on some of the very things I’ll share with you here. After a short time of working together, Kathy told me her husband commented about how much happier she was, and the more we talked she realized she didn’t have the Sunday blues any more. Her coworkers did not change, her boss did not change, her work did not change much at all, but she did start working on projects she liked more and using her talents better for herself and for the company. The main difference that caused Kathy’s stress level to dial way back was merely applying these mindsets and using these techniques. They are easy to apply immediately and if you choose, will make a significant difference for you too.
Stress Less?
What's the difference between managing stress and preventing stress? In our work processes, we know all too well the differences between managing and preventing problems, and this is essentially the same approach. Some factors can be addressed to prevent and reduce stress, so like anything else, it’s generally far better to be strategic than to just accept what comes your way.
**Think about your Top 3 Stressors, or your top 3 challenges that cause you stress. Another way to determine what stresses you out is to list out some tolerations, or things that you are putting up with from yourself, your work, your life, or other people. It may help to consider your various environments.
Take Responsibility for the Quality of Your Days
You can have a balanced, happy, productive life by applying some simple, proven concepts. As a business coach I often help my clients focus on ways to WORK BETTER so they can LIVE MORE LIFE. So how do you Work Better (get more done in less time) in order to Live More Life (do what you really want)?
You own your day, no one else can force you to feel a certain way or to do things that you don't want to do. Yes, sometimes it feels like choosing the lesser of two bad options, but it is still a choice. So how do we strive for a more quality experience in work or life, especially on those days when we feel, well, Maxed Out?
If you approach the day with a sense of rushed frustration, saying something like” Today is gonna be rough, I have so much to do, I have to call so-and-so, and I have this meeting, and my boss said she wants to talk later about that project, AH I’d really like to play hooky today but I really can’t. Ugh!” it is guaranteed to be a stressful day. Versus taking an approach of “Today I have a lot going on and I want this to be a really great day! I may just close the deal with so-and-so, and I have an opportunity to speak up in that meeting, and this afternoon I’m going to suggest at least one way I can add more value to the project and I going to ask my boss to support me on this."
Decide What You Want
Believe it or not, knowing what you want ion life and working toward something specific that you want lessens your stress considerably.
One of the best ways to increase your feeling in control is to manage your activities better. See various other posts on Effectiveness & Time Management in this blog. Another great way to be more relaxed and feel more in control is through Mind Games. This is not about playing mind games, but using the power of the mind to beat the stress game. Decide what you want and focus on that.
Positive Expectation
When entering into any situation, project, sales meeting, conversation with your boss or that difficult coworker or client, begin with the end in mind. Once you’ve established a good understanding of your desired outcome, then you want to use your creative mind to turn that Desired Outcome into a Positive Expectation. Any person with an imagination is capable of this, it’s fun, and it produces awesome results. Ok, so a little more how-to:
Consider how you want to feel at the end of the conversation, or the end of your day. Then use words that indicate it has already happened like you want, and is not merely wishful thinking.
**Think about your top three stress challenges right now, and the tolerations in your work and life. What do you want to change? Let’s take that one step further. What is your positive expectation, framed in the affirmative? As an example: Maybe, "I stay late at work too often." becomes "I want to leave work on time." WHY? Then take it to the next level which is far more powerful, such as, saying at the end of a work day, “I feel satisfied with a job well done today and I look forward to cooking dinner with my family.”
Setting your Purpose, Mission, or Goal
Specifically, what are you working toward? Take a look in your calendar(s) and your bank statement(s) --this is where your time and money is going. Consider what you REALLY want in your life and work. What do you want to be known for? What do you want to change over the next few weeks, months, year?
How can you possibly get from A to B if you don’t know what B is? Do you just get in your car and start driving aimlessly? NO, before you get to the end of your street, you know your desired destination. Strangely, most people don’t know what they want. Like most people, I used to spend more time determining where to go for dinner, or making out my shopping list than determining what to accomplish over the next year.
Ponder your purpose, your big picture, i.e. "Why are you here?" Determine the Mission you are on right now, maybe it's your career or a large project regarding your household or community. What are your passions? If you haven't done so already, write down a primary goal, something specific enough so that you know when you succeeded and can celebrate, and something personally meaningful for YOU.
Hints: Saying you want more time or money isn't specific enough– what will you do when you have the time or money? **Write down 2 things you would do more of if you didn’t have to worry about time or money. Also, it's not enough to say, I just want to be happy. You are fully in control of that right now, regardless of your present situation. Happiness is a state of mind that you deserve to feel daily and is not a goal or mission or purpose statement. **Take 5 minutes and answer the following: What helps you create or sustain your own happiness and why?
Relaxed Control in Summary
When you catch yourself saying things like, “He makes me mad!” or “I felt sick about that.” Or “My heart skipped a beat.” Or “I never have enough time!,” acknowledge that it is your response to something or someone--and you made youself feel mad or sick or nervous; stressed.
When striving for a state of relaxed control, you realize fully that your responses are always within your control, even if they seem to be at super-speed in the subconscious, and these directly affect the level of stress you experience...and with practice they will be more and more as intentional responses rather then conditioned reactions.
Your Challenge
Will you commit to ONE of these for 21 days, and see what amazing things happen? Are you ready to experience that Relaxed Control? Imagine how different life will be in less than a month!
What is your new, positive expectation for yourself? What do you have to gain? What do you have to lose?
See also Are You Truly Effective? and Tackling Procrastination
Relaxed Control
What does this mean? You may think this is an oxymoron (like 'jumbo shrimp'), but I believe it is a much better way to describe the opposite of stressed than “not stressed.” First, however, let's establish what stress is.
Stress is...a feeling that's created when we react to particular events. Or: physical, mental, or emotional strain or tension.
A client of mine "Kathy" is a project leader in a large company. She came to me originally because she felt so unhappy about her work shewanted to talk about career options. However in her case, another job was not the solution and we went to work on some of the very things I’ll share with you here. After a short time of working together, Kathy told me her husband commented about how much happier she was, and the more we talked she realized she didn’t have the Sunday blues any more. Her coworkers did not change, her boss did not change, her work did not change much at all, but she did start working on projects she liked more and using her talents better for herself and for the company. The main difference that caused Kathy’s stress level to dial way back was merely applying these mindsets and using these techniques. They are easy to apply immediately and if you choose, will make a significant difference for you too.
Stress Less?
What's the difference between managing stress and preventing stress? In our work processes, we know all too well the differences between managing and preventing problems, and this is essentially the same approach. Some factors can be addressed to prevent and reduce stress, so like anything else, it’s generally far better to be strategic than to just accept what comes your way.
**Think about your Top 3 Stressors, or your top 3 challenges that cause you stress. Another way to determine what stresses you out is to list out some tolerations, or things that you are putting up with from yourself, your work, your life, or other people. It may help to consider your various environments.
Take Responsibility for the Quality of Your Days
You can have a balanced, happy, productive life by applying some simple, proven concepts. As a business coach I often help my clients focus on ways to WORK BETTER so they can LIVE MORE LIFE. So how do you Work Better (get more done in less time) in order to Live More Life (do what you really want)?
You own your day, no one else can force you to feel a certain way or to do things that you don't want to do. Yes, sometimes it feels like choosing the lesser of two bad options, but it is still a choice. So how do we strive for a more quality experience in work or life, especially on those days when we feel, well, Maxed Out?
If you approach the day with a sense of rushed frustration, saying something like” Today is gonna be rough, I have so much to do, I have to call so-and-so, and I have this meeting, and my boss said she wants to talk later about that project, AH I’d really like to play hooky today but I really can’t. Ugh!” it is guaranteed to be a stressful day. Versus taking an approach of “Today I have a lot going on and I want this to be a really great day! I may just close the deal with so-and-so, and I have an opportunity to speak up in that meeting, and this afternoon I’m going to suggest at least one way I can add more value to the project and I going to ask my boss to support me on this."
Decide What You Want
Believe it or not, knowing what you want ion life and working toward something specific that you want lessens your stress considerably.
One of the best ways to increase your feeling in control is to manage your activities better. See various other posts on Effectiveness & Time Management in this blog. Another great way to be more relaxed and feel more in control is through Mind Games. This is not about playing mind games, but using the power of the mind to beat the stress game. Decide what you want and focus on that.
Positive Expectation
When entering into any situation, project, sales meeting, conversation with your boss or that difficult coworker or client, begin with the end in mind. Once you’ve established a good understanding of your desired outcome, then you want to use your creative mind to turn that Desired Outcome into a Positive Expectation. Any person with an imagination is capable of this, it’s fun, and it produces awesome results. Ok, so a little more how-to:
Consider how you want to feel at the end of the conversation, or the end of your day. Then use words that indicate it has already happened like you want, and is not merely wishful thinking.
**Think about your top three stress challenges right now, and the tolerations in your work and life. What do you want to change? Let’s take that one step further. What is your positive expectation, framed in the affirmative? As an example: Maybe, "I stay late at work too often." becomes "I want to leave work on time." WHY? Then take it to the next level which is far more powerful, such as, saying at the end of a work day, “I feel satisfied with a job well done today and I look forward to cooking dinner with my family.”
Setting your Purpose, Mission, or Goal
Specifically, what are you working toward? Take a look in your calendar(s) and your bank statement(s) --this is where your time and money is going. Consider what you REALLY want in your life and work. What do you want to be known for? What do you want to change over the next few weeks, months, year?
How can you possibly get from A to B if you don’t know what B is? Do you just get in your car and start driving aimlessly? NO, before you get to the end of your street, you know your desired destination. Strangely, most people don’t know what they want. Like most people, I used to spend more time determining where to go for dinner, or making out my shopping list than determining what to accomplish over the next year.
Ponder your purpose, your big picture, i.e. "Why are you here?" Determine the Mission you are on right now, maybe it's your career or a large project regarding your household or community. What are your passions? If you haven't done so already, write down a primary goal, something specific enough so that you know when you succeeded and can celebrate, and something personally meaningful for YOU.
Hints: Saying you want more time or money isn't specific enough– what will you do when you have the time or money? **Write down 2 things you would do more of if you didn’t have to worry about time or money. Also, it's not enough to say, I just want to be happy. You are fully in control of that right now, regardless of your present situation. Happiness is a state of mind that you deserve to feel daily and is not a goal or mission or purpose statement. **Take 5 minutes and answer the following: What helps you create or sustain your own happiness and why?
Relaxed Control in Summary
When you catch yourself saying things like, “He makes me mad!” or “I felt sick about that.” Or “My heart skipped a beat.” Or “I never have enough time!,” acknowledge that it is your response to something or someone--and you made youself feel mad or sick or nervous; stressed.
When striving for a state of relaxed control, you realize fully that your responses are always within your control, even if they seem to be at super-speed in the subconscious, and these directly affect the level of stress you experience...and with practice they will be more and more as intentional responses rather then conditioned reactions.
Your Challenge
Will you commit to ONE of these for 21 days, and see what amazing things happen? Are you ready to experience that Relaxed Control? Imagine how different life will be in less than a month!
What is your new, positive expectation for yourself? What do you have to gain? What do you have to lose?
See also Are You Truly Effective? and Tackling Procrastination
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Peacefulness: Week 10
Peace, Tranquility, and Relaxation.
Aaaaaahhhhh.
(Read about the 13 traits)
Yeah, there is some irony that I am writing this on a Sunday at about 9pm and I am committed to getting up at 5am for the gym. But well, since I own my business I also completely own my schedule and I can work whenever I like. And I can relax whenever I like.
My strategy this week is to incorporate some relaxing moments and/or tranquil thoughts daily, as well as try daily meditation Monday through Friday. This is the part where I tell you that I am a bit A-type and most of my life did not know how to truly relax, and clearing my mind is pretty much impossible.
Since becoming a coach, I have learned the power of the mind and have tackled many things I once thought impossible. Therefore, I am giving meditation a real honest-to-goodness shot this time. I have also learned the power of relaxation (even if I still have to set the timer to truly let myself relax- freakish, I know!), and of visualizing events and images for things I would really like to see happen. So I am excited to embrace this right now, plus it fits oh-so-nicely with one of the books I am currently reading: Eat Pray Love, and she is in India at the Ashram...
I still have a bit of a mental hurdle regarding the meditation, but I discovered that there are many forms of meditation and that pretty much everyone struggles initially - so it just takes practice. I also am thoroughly sold on the benefits.
So- here goes: I, Heather Legge, of Envision Success Inc, commit to posting my progress on this little relaxation and meditation journey of mine this week (and to catching up on past posts soon). Stay tuned!
Monday update: I recited several times "Om Namah Shivaya" aka "I honor the divinity that resides within me." It was definitely peaceful. Although I am honestly not feeling the mantra as just saying it, I know there is value in simply concentrating ones thoughts and voice in one direction.
Tuesday update: WOW, a VERY productive last few days. That's the good news. The bad news is that I've been staying up late and getting pretty caught up in " Get Er Done" mode, and I skipped the gym this morning in favor of sleep, didn't eat well, nor did I experience any tranquil thoughts since Monday update above. OK, wait - YET. I will make some time before bed to breathe, think calming thoughts, and do a 20-minute guided relaxation before sleep. Aaaaahhhhh, I feel better already.
Later update: I turned it around over the next few days and was able to embrace Peacefulness more fully. I found myself much more aware of my ability to be more relaxed, peaceful, or tranquil in just about any situation. Next round, I would like to sign up for a meditation class and force a bit more growth in this area.
Aaaaaahhhhh.
(Read about the 13 traits)
Yeah, there is some irony that I am writing this on a Sunday at about 9pm and I am committed to getting up at 5am for the gym. But well, since I own my business I also completely own my schedule and I can work whenever I like. And I can relax whenever I like.
My strategy this week is to incorporate some relaxing moments and/or tranquil thoughts daily, as well as try daily meditation Monday through Friday. This is the part where I tell you that I am a bit A-type and most of my life did not know how to truly relax, and clearing my mind is pretty much impossible.
Since becoming a coach, I have learned the power of the mind and have tackled many things I once thought impossible. Therefore, I am giving meditation a real honest-to-goodness shot this time. I have also learned the power of relaxation (even if I still have to set the timer to truly let myself relax- freakish, I know!), and of visualizing events and images for things I would really like to see happen. So I am excited to embrace this right now, plus it fits oh-so-nicely with one of the books I am currently reading: Eat Pray Love, and she is in India at the Ashram...
I still have a bit of a mental hurdle regarding the meditation, but I discovered that there are many forms of meditation and that pretty much everyone struggles initially - so it just takes practice. I also am thoroughly sold on the benefits.
So- here goes: I, Heather Legge, of Envision Success Inc, commit to posting my progress on this little relaxation and meditation journey of mine this week (and to catching up on past posts soon). Stay tuned!
Monday update: I recited several times "Om Namah Shivaya" aka "I honor the divinity that resides within me." It was definitely peaceful. Although I am honestly not feeling the mantra as just saying it, I know there is value in simply concentrating ones thoughts and voice in one direction.
Tuesday update: WOW, a VERY productive last few days. That's the good news. The bad news is that I've been staying up late and getting pretty caught up in " Get Er Done" mode, and I skipped the gym this morning in favor of sleep, didn't eat well, nor did I experience any tranquil thoughts since Monday update above. OK, wait - YET. I will make some time before bed to breathe, think calming thoughts, and do a 20-minute guided relaxation before sleep. Aaaaahhhhh, I feel better already.
Later update: I turned it around over the next few days and was able to embrace Peacefulness more fully. I found myself much more aware of my ability to be more relaxed, peaceful, or tranquil in just about any situation. Next round, I would like to sign up for a meditation class and force a bit more growth in this area.
Friday, September 18, 2009
Intention: Week 5
Post 5 of 13 traits. Read more.
Intention, ah...I can't help but think of the phrase, "The road to Hell is paved with good intentions." For some reason, this has been a staple phrase in my subconscious for many years.
So we can state that intention is not enough; we have to follow it up with action. But how? I am a big proponent for what is called "inspired action." In other words, when you know what you want, you will know what to do. It's when your intentions are not very clear that actions too are muddied.
My expected focus for this week was to visualize desired outcomes (much more) for lots of things: my business, proposals, projects, clients, transactions, and even conversations. ie, What do I want this person I am meeting with to experience today? As much as I teach my clients this technique, I can't claim that I am applying it 100% of the time either, and I was happy to give it some extra attention for a week.
The technique involves thinking about, articulating, and then pretending it's really possible---whatever outcome you'd really like to see. As an example, I asked a client Wednesday what she would really like to happen during an event she was co-hosting and she starting talking about it, and as she was explaining to me during her session, she was defining it for herself. And it was cool!
One reason this works so well is because once you articulate what it is that you want, then you will see opportunities differently, you will make different assumptions, you will use different words and interact differently with others. In short you will make those teeny-tiny decisions differently that you are confronted with a thousand times a day and will create the situation as you'd like it to happen. Long term, this means better results.
So yes, as expected, a lot of awesome stuff happened this week!
I'm back to journaling nightly.
And now for Communcation...
Intention, ah...I can't help but think of the phrase, "The road to Hell is paved with good intentions." For some reason, this has been a staple phrase in my subconscious for many years.
So we can state that intention is not enough; we have to follow it up with action. But how? I am a big proponent for what is called "inspired action." In other words, when you know what you want, you will know what to do. It's when your intentions are not very clear that actions too are muddied.
My expected focus for this week was to visualize desired outcomes (much more) for lots of things: my business, proposals, projects, clients, transactions, and even conversations. ie, What do I want this person I am meeting with to experience today? As much as I teach my clients this technique, I can't claim that I am applying it 100% of the time either, and I was happy to give it some extra attention for a week.
The technique involves thinking about, articulating, and then pretending it's really possible---whatever outcome you'd really like to see. As an example, I asked a client Wednesday what she would really like to happen during an event she was co-hosting and she starting talking about it, and as she was explaining to me during her session, she was defining it for herself. And it was cool!
One reason this works so well is because once you articulate what it is that you want, then you will see opportunities differently, you will make different assumptions, you will use different words and interact differently with others. In short you will make those teeny-tiny decisions differently that you are confronted with a thousand times a day and will create the situation as you'd like it to happen. Long term, this means better results.
So yes, as expected, a lot of awesome stuff happened this week!
I'm back to journaling nightly.
And now for Communcation...
Thursday, January 15, 2009
It's Going to Be a Good Year!
A VERY GOOD YEAR.
Why will some businesses thrive this year, while others will close their doors?
Could it be a matter of expectation?
I know, that doesn't appeal to our human nature of making things more complicated than they need to be. Yet there is a simple truth here that I'd like to serve up. Straight up.
A Guessing Game
Every one of us has made guesses, which upon coming true, proved our ability to tell the future. Probably every one of us has made a prophecy, or a "guess" when we were pretty darn sure of the outcome. Sometimes it's a no-brainer; we just know. Other times it's pure braggadocio.
Expectation is the Key
In those moments when we must declare certainty, can we alter a plain guess into a prophecy? Most people tend to do this only when there is an intuitive nudge in one direction or the other, but there is something to be said for making a bold affirmative statement. And what about intentionally creating expectation in the desired direction?
Expect the Best!
Try it! Expect the best possible outcome from the next situation you go into. Want a new client from that networking event, or a new contract from that sales meeting, or a raise from your next performance review? Make a bold affirmative statement, declaring your desired outcome!
Figure out exactly what you want, believe it is possible, then go into it expecting success.
Let's apply this to a whole year's worth of transactions...think of the cumulative effects! When you expect the best you will make decisions differently, you will have a spring in your step, you will look for opportunities rather than succumb to failure, and you will likely have a much better year in 2009 than someone else guessed.
Why will some businesses thrive this year, while others will close their doors?
Could it be a matter of expectation?
I know, that doesn't appeal to our human nature of making things more complicated than they need to be. Yet there is a simple truth here that I'd like to serve up. Straight up.
A Guessing Game
Every one of us has made guesses, which upon coming true, proved our ability to tell the future. Probably every one of us has made a prophecy, or a "guess" when we were pretty darn sure of the outcome. Sometimes it's a no-brainer; we just know. Other times it's pure braggadocio.
Expectation is the Key
In those moments when we must declare certainty, can we alter a plain guess into a prophecy? Most people tend to do this only when there is an intuitive nudge in one direction or the other, but there is something to be said for making a bold affirmative statement. And what about intentionally creating expectation in the desired direction?
Expect the Best!
Try it! Expect the best possible outcome from the next situation you go into. Want a new client from that networking event, or a new contract from that sales meeting, or a raise from your next performance review? Make a bold affirmative statement, declaring your desired outcome!
Figure out exactly what you want, believe it is possible, then go into it expecting success.
Let's apply this to a whole year's worth of transactions...think of the cumulative effects! When you expect the best you will make decisions differently, you will have a spring in your step, you will look for opportunities rather than succumb to failure, and you will likely have a much better year in 2009 than someone else guessed.
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